If you grew up in similar Christian religious circles as I did, you likely heard this belief: being anxious is a result of being distant from God. In some circles, anxiety is even taken to the extreme of being sinful, an active choice to live out of alignment with God’s will for your life. Christians are to exude joy and peace. After all, how can a human who has embraced true grace and love be anxious? There is no room for anxiety amidst overwhelming grace. There is also no room for the fullness and depth of humanity.
These thoughts and convictions may have been made explicitly by a leader or implicitly as a “don’t ask, don’t tell” congregational and family systematic rule. not only create deep shame, but they also undermine who we are created to be. If we are told not to feel natural human emotions, we must bypass these parts of ourselves to seek realignment with the image we hope to convey. By bypassing the guilt we feel for our anxiety, we discover shame that says we are anxious because there is something inherently wrong with our humanity.
Anxiety is a biological response by our nervous system to perceived threats. To live without anxiety is to live without fear entirely. Imagine crossing the street without fear of perceived threats. Anxiety allows us to live a life of fullness within natural and intrinsic boundaries. So shaming our anxiety is shaming our identity and humanness.
Jesus felt anxiety in the Garden of Gethsemane. He called on his friends to be with him when he needed human connection and comfort, but they did not wake. Jesus then called out to his Father to allow another way to gain communion and redemption with humanity than for him to die by crucifixion and torture. He experienced such intense anxiety that some English Bible translations state He sweated blood, a condition associated with an extreme nervous system response to stress called hematridrosus.
When we experience trauma, our minds and nervous systems may perceive past threats as current experiences. Trauma causes time fragmentation that affects memories, emotions, and the nervous system’s response to threats. When we feel anxiety that is disproportionate to an event, our bodies may react by sweating, clenching our hands, feeling restless legs, or an urge to run, verbally lash out at others, or feel physically stuck in our bodies. When this happens, our bodies are reacting to a perceived threat through a fight, flight, or freeze trauma response.
You are not broken. You are not feeling these things because you are misaligned with God. Your body is responding to the present as if it were a threat from the past that has caused harm. There is love, grace, and redemption for your trauma and your nervous system’s response. Your anxiety is reminding you that your body wants to keep you safe. It is okay to honor your anxiety with kindness and curiosity.
Genesis 1:27 says that we are made in the image of God. God invites us to feel as He feels. When we feel emotions, how much more so must God feel them if we are made in His image? Anxiety does not make you dirty, distant, or broken. Anxiety means that you are human.